Do Not Talk About These 7 Things Soon After Sex

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No matter if this is your booty call, FWB, or ONS, these seven are 'not what to say to a man after making love' situations

Pillow talk. A place that is so pure, so dirty and raw (thanks Zayn Malik for the lyrics), and yet, so volatile. You can either screw the experience or make something magical of it. Which brings us to the tricky question of 'what to say to a man after making love?' 

The fact is that as much as you consider pillow talk to be the time to talk for some serious DTR (define the relationship) topics, its not. Your hormones are high, you are still in the mood and pretty vulnerable yourself. So don't go destroying that comfort zone you just created by talking about everything under the sun, especially some serious relationship issues. 

Because doing so can only result in two things: your partner shutting down emotionally. Or, being insincere in their responses. None of these fruitful for your relationship and definitely what you want to hear. So then what to say to a man after making love? 

Scroll down to see what you must avoid, no matter if this is your booty call, FWB, or ONS.

These 7 Are 'Not What To Say To A Man After Making Love' Situations
1.  Don't talk about your partner's performance 

Unless you can't refrain yourself from complimenting your partner, or they are asking for feedback, avoid talking about performance altogether. Your moves or that of your partners' aren't meant to be rated.

So its not really about performance, but intimacy. But when you start talking about performance in terms of scale, you will ruin the intimacy. Your partner might shut down emotionally and this might take a toll on their vulnerability. 

2. Don't comment on their body 

Refrain from sharing how you feel about your partner's body. You are with them because you love them as a whole and not because of just part of their body.

Sex is a deeply intimate act and other than complimenting or appreciating each other, there shouldn't be any reason to talk about your partner's body. And No! This is not the time to bring up gym.

3. Avoid bringing up issues of conflicts 

You have been fighting with your partner about something, but you just shared the most vulnerable moments with him/her. You don't want to ruin it all by again bringing the same topic.

Or for that matter any topic that you think might trigger your partner. This is nothing but a buzz kill and trust us, nobody would benefit from a fight right after sex.

4. Don't talk to them about how they learnt their moves 

It could literally be as simple as reading a book. But as long as you don't discuss how they learnt those moves, all is well. Because this eventually leads to talks about exes and trust us, neither you nor your partner are interested to talk about this, especially when you are in such a vulnerable spot yourself. 

Nothing good can come of this topic of discussion and so, its better to refrain from asking your partner.

5. Don't be opportunistic to get your work done

Sex (consensual) is an intimate act between two people who hopefully love each other. And so it shouldn't be used as a psychological weapon.

So if you have some business that your partner doesn't agree with or something he is unwilling to do, this is not the time to get it done. It will come across as manipulation and your partner will feel pressured. So remember this is definitely not what to say to a man after making love situations. 

6. Don't talk about his exes, please

Your partner shared some moments with his ex and that should remain between them. If you feel the need to know, right after sex is not the time to do it. 

Yes, you must discuss sexual history with your partner, for the sake of your health. But at a different time. Definitely do not say "My ex used to..." or "My ex wanted to..."

7. Don't, just don't talk about the future of your relationship 

Sex isn't always about commitment and neither is it a promise that your intimacy will result in a relationship. So don't push it, especially right after sex. Yes, its important to be on the same page in your relationship, but save the real relationship talk for some other time. 

Keep this moment, sweet, vulnerable and light. Enjoy it with your partner as best you can and leave the heavy topics for next time. 

Also read: 9 First Time Sex Tips That Will Totally Change Your Love Life

(All images courtesy: Pixabay)

Written by

Marga Guangzon